Wanted List

Well this weekend really involved no outings. Actually...I lied. We had dragonboat practice yesterday. That was fun. It was so much more pleasant out on the water in the sun and warm temperatures! I didn't even get crazy tired this time...maybe I wasn't trying hard enough. Then my mom came and we went out for supper. It tasted delicious. My buffalo chicken burger was dripping in sauce...just the way I like it! The stanley cup finals started - and the team I picked won. (Are you getting worried yet Cory?) Breakfast this morning at Coras - it was wonderful. Used to go there every now and then - it had been a long time since I last went - and it was just as good as I remembered


So most people know that I struggle and am not overly successful in the "dating department." I have my lack of judgement sometimes. So spending some quality time with myself the last few weeks I've created a mental list of things that I think a "great guy" would enjoy. The list is not so much a list of qualities as those seem rather obvious - but instead a list of activities and interests. Of course this is like a wish list - not a list of qualifications. I think having high standards is good - but I could handle if one, two or three things on "the list" weren't met. (Maybe). Guys willing to try them though - bonus points!


The potential guy would have to...
1) Love to watch hockey - or better yet - play it!
2) Want to play catch on those nice spring and summer days
3) Be willing to engage in activities such as golf, tennis, basketball, baseball, rollerblade - and be okay if they lost every now and then! haha
4) Like the idea of getting up early for breakfast on the rare occassion - I Love my Breakfasts!
5) Want to camp - even if it is in a tent...
6) Be willing to spend a day fishing...even if they don't like it - just try it out! (summer and winter!)
7) Play games! Random challenges of blockus, monopoly, life, Wii, cribbage and whatever else involves some "friendly" competition.
8) Pretend to listen when I ramble about my school adventures - or misadventures.
9) Accept the fetish I have for pens, sharpie markers, stamps and dice.
10) Enjoy food (really..who doesn't?!?)- bbqs, homecooked meals, and going out to eat!
11) Bombers games, goldeyes games, moose games, and whatever else there is to watch

Not an extensive list - more to be added I'm sure. Until then...I'll keep dreaming!

So Say What's On Your Mind...I Can't Figure Out Just What's Inside

May Long Weekend is almost over. This is the last long weekend of the school year, so we are now officially into the home stretch. I am sure that it'll be a good stretch and that time will pass quickly. Then summer will be here in full force.

There isn't a lot to report in terms of excitment this weekend. Friday was a quiet night. Saturday my mom came to visit and brought me noodle soup. We braved the wicked winds and walked for supper, then we came back and drove to get a super milkshake. Sunday I went back home and visited Cory and Christines. They fed me supper - I'm Lucky. We had a fire. I love fires, probably one of my favorite things. What I don't really love is the smell that lingers in the hair and clothes afterwards. So I stayed at mom and dads for night. I made sure that I kept my smokey clothes outside my bedroom door, but still had trouble falling asleep. First my toes were nearly frozen...the evening was beautiful, but it wasn't quite flipflop weather just yet. Second my hair smelled so as I was breathing under my blanket to try and warm up I kept inhaling smoke fumes. Eventually I did fall asleep and do feel somewhat rested today.

Sometimes I think myself crazy. I know I've wrote about that before...and the trend continues. But here's the issue. Sometimes you want something to happen and you spend a lot of time convincing yourself that there is a possibility - at the same time you prepare yourself that it wont happen, so really you are just contradicting yourself. It's a battle. It's one thing to look at the world through rose-colored lenses but eventually reality will set in and I think you need to be prepared. I guess when it all comes down to it you need to allow yourself to believe and think that everything will happen as it's suppossed to. But wow, is that ever hard!

Most people know that chocolate milk and bananas top my list of favorite things, but here are a few other things that would make the list:
- smoothies...but ones that have chunks...should smoothies have chunks?
- peas! it's my favorite lunch snack!
- real fruit popsicles
- waking up and realizing that you still have 2 hours to sleep!
- foot massages...wow it's been awhile since i've had one of those!
- falling asleep when there is a nice breeze coming through the window

Hockey starts soon. If Dallas wins tonight it makes things very interesting...I guess we'll see how that unfolds. Hockey would be better if there was someone to share it with...

Happy Mom's Day

I owe my mom a lot. She just had a birthday and today is Mother's Day and I really did nothing for her. I actually probably made her days worse because I put my own selfish needs first. I thought that I knew better by now. I know I still have a lot to learn.

How lucky am I to have a mom that loves me more than words can say, even on days like today, when I'm anything but lovable. She is always there to listen to me to hear me out. My ideas might not always be the most positive or well developed, but she listens to them anyway. Anytime I need ANYTHING my mom is always willing to do what she can to help out. She doesn't hesitate to get into her vehicle and drive an hour to come see me, even if I insist that I want to be alone. It's probably a good thing she's so persistant - cause I am stubborn. If it weren't for her I know I would have never gone to the doctor last Saturday...or the Saturday before that...and I'd have some serious case of strep by now. One of these days I guess I'll have to grow up and do those things on my own free will. There are very few people that I can vent to, both the good and bad, and mom is the one who hears the most. I often feel guilty about the added stress that I put on her, but I know that she appreciates my openness. Mom, I love you lots, even though I never do enough to show it. Know that I've been blessed to have you for a mom and a best friend, and that without you I'd be a lost soul! Love you lots.

Funny how fast things change. 2 weeks ago at this time I was a pretty happy person. Things were going good. That whole week was a refreshing experience. I enjoyed it. I thought things were going to be normal. I was excited and nervous. Last week things started to change and today I found out why. Sometimes I don't understand why things happen, but I guess that they do. There are consequences for putting yourself out there...hopefully some day there will be some positive consequences, cause it is the hardest thing for me to do. I think I'll probably crawl into my shell for a while. When I think I know what I want, it always seems to be the wrong time. Go figure.

Well hockey is on. Something to keep my mind occupied. It's been a long day.

My Mother My Friend
I've noticed that as I grow older I still rely on you, my mother, for many things.

Although those things have changed over the years, my love for you hasn't.

It's just grown deeper, just like our friendship.
As a child I relied on you to love me, and to feed me.

I took for granted that you were always there.

I knew no other world.
As a teenager I gained an appreciation for what you did.

But saw the world through the eyes of someone who was a little selfish

and didn't "thank you" enough.
As an adult, I am so thankful for the friendship that has blossomed between us.

You are still my mother and yes,

I do rely on you for the love that only a "mother" can give.
The years have shown me that you not only are you a wonderful mother,

but one of the "best friends" anyone could ever wish for.
And I still can't " Thank You " enough.

It's Been A While...

Well I've missed updates for the past few weeks. I guess things have been busy. The past two weeks have been anything but normal. My usual living patterns have been somewhat disrupted. I think I'm dealing surprisingly well. I still like routine though and look forward to returning to some consistency.

I wasn't in school today because apparently I have strep throat. I started to feel less than ideal last week Thursday but thought it was just from a long day at school. Then Friday I had a hard time eating my banana in the morning and things just sort of got progressively worse through the day. It was a long one. On Saturday I pretty much got dragged to the clinic - cause I would never go on my own terms, and got some medication. That added to the medication I was already taking has not been a good mix. But I guess these things happens and it certainly could be worse so I have no reason to complain. Maybe I should thank my mother for forcing me to go to the clinic cause who knows where I'd be if I hadn't.

Macy and Cory's social has come and gone. It was quite the success and I did have an excellent time. Was a busy and rather eventful weekend - now I'm looking forward to the wedding celebration!

Aside from the exciting events, there have some intense decisions to make. When all is said and done I think I've made the right choices. At least the right choices for this time in my life. Although things have been quite unnormal - there have been some things that have seemed quite normally - somewhat ironic. I hope that part of the normal continues - I'd be happy with that.

No hockey on tonight...or until Thursday. That sorta really puts me at a lost. I'll have to see what I can find to occupy my time.

Till next time...